I am lost and just stuck. I don’t know how to pull myself out of this. It’s been 4 years since I lost my partner. He was the love of my life. Everyone tells me that I am young and will just find someone new, but I find that the loss of him has been brought up even more with the most recent loss of my brother. He would have been here to support me. Instead I am alone and struggling by myself with no one to comfort me. I don’t even know what I am looking for with writing this. It just sucks feeling so isolated all the time.
Well, you are grieving almost again for your previous loss of your husband and for your brother. It has almost been a year in grief of losing my husband. I can imagine we would again grieve at times they would have been such comfort. It feels so hard to not have my Ted's support for many issues. I guess we are kinda like a lonely hearts club here so I guess you came to a good place. I will say a prayer for you to have some comfort somehow in your losses.
Thank you so much for your kind words. It has been really tough and I don't feel like I have an outlet. I have suffered a lot of loss over the years and admittedly, it has left me feeling hopeless that things wont get better. Hard some days to keep the motivation to keep moving forward.
You're very welcome! Another thing I learned recently on being a widow is that when someone passes that we are connected with, we have natural unstable feelings for a while as though the ground had shifted under our feet. In fact it has. The article said that people who believed in God and had faith that God's promises are true even went through a struggle with that when dealing with such a loss. It helps some for me to see it articulated. As to having hope, certainly we have lost what we hoped to keep in our losses but I think as we continue to allow ourselves to connect with our tears that it relieves the pain. After so much crying at this point when a wave of utter sadness comes, it's beginning to be like that it connects me with my person. Somehow I think we will make and be whole again. As to hope, I guess we have to have the despair in order to grieve so hope can be possible. Does this make sense? I think it might be good to think of anything at all that you could possibly have some peace about, whether it's getting something to cook in your crick pot and then deciding to take a day off from worrying and just rest. You could also pray for God to help you connect with him and not feel so alone and hopeless. In the Bible Jesus said that what we ask in his name we can have. He said to believe we receive it when we ask for it. Then give thanks and expect it has been done and will manifest.
