I am new here. It's so hard to reach out for some reason. Even online. Just lost my mom to a battle with Cancer. Although they are afflicted by this disease, it's not always apparent on the outside. You "know" the inevitable is coming, but when it happens it's still surprising. Especially when they go in the hospital on a Monday night and they're gone by Wednesday. I miss her so much. I miss her for the big things to come, but especially for all the small things that we did on a daily basis. I miss our telephone conversation every day when I left work all the way home. I miss our dinners together and also having her there for so many big and little things. I feel so sad. My fiancé did not react the same way when his parents passed. So he isn't talking to me about it. He seems to expect me to be the "strong silent type". Which I can be at times, but what about when I'm not? Now that I've lost both parents within 4 years of each other, being an only child, I feel completely alone. I realized after she passed that I no longer had unconditional love in my life. People are there for you when it first happens, but once the funeral happens, they all go about their lives (which they should), however, all the people that wanted to help are nowhere to be found once the feelings start to fade away. It's ok and normal for everyone to move on, but for the person that's going through it, it's just the beginning of a long hard road. Again, knowing and living it are two different feelings. I swear I just went through this with Dad. It was only 4 years ago. How do I do this again? How do I start sleeping, eating, breathing, laughing, or live again?