RIP Alaya Marshall

Discussion in 'Coping with Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss' started by Tayler Lake, Mar 18, 2019.

  1. Tayler Lake

    Tayler Lake New Member

    I lost my babygirl when I was 22 weeks and 4 days. The doctors told me that if she would’ve stayed in 3 more days she would still be here with me. My cervix was short so it couldn’t hold her in and she came too early. There are a lot of things that I feel could’ve saved her life if things were done differently but it angers me because I’m only thinking of it now after it’s too late and my heart is already broken. I blame myself for so many problems but the hospital also made some problems but nobody’s perfect so I can’t blame them, it all falls down on me. I miss my daughter so much it kills me. I’m still in high school so everyone just says that losing her was “god giving me another chance in life” when all I want is my daughter back. I can’t stop feeling like I need another baby but even when I think about that I realize that if I were to have mother babygirl that child wouldn’t be my 1st born and they couldn’t replace Alaya.