My mom

Discussion in 'Coping After a Sudden Loss' started by Payden Clark, Feb 6, 2019.

  1. Payden Clark

    Payden Clark Member

    So today has been a hard day I woke up i prayed I went back to sleep, because I couldn’t Deal with all the pain. Then I woke back up I went downstairs I ate I came back upstairs and I slept again. I feel like there’s this big black hole pulling into the ground. I feel like there’s nothing to live for anymore. And I don’t like to express my feelings because I feel weak, I know that sounds stupid but it’s the truth. My mom was a very special person she was actually my grandma but she took me in when my mom couldn’t take care of me she took me in when my dad left she took me in when I had no one else. When I think of the memories we had everything turns off and I’m so depressed, I remember this special day it was the night before my birthday she told me that if I ever need anything I can always go to her she told me if she’s not here to always pray and she’ll be here with me.We baked cookies on that day and we were washing the dishes and she just started throwing bubbles on me, that was the happiest moment I could ever think of. Without her here with me I don’t know what to do but if it wasn’t for her I wouldn’t be the woman I am today. I hope everyone gets the help they need. I still have her slippers, I can’t get rid of them I wear them to school literally, she was just an angel waiting to go home I hope the best for everyone and you guys can get through this.
  2. griefic

    griefic Administrator Staff Member

    Payden, I'm so sorry for what you're going through. You've suffered a very significant loss, and when it comes to certain people, if we're ever to live without them, the void they leave behind is tremendous. There's no replacing that void, and I think we find ourselves longing for it to be filled. I hope in time you are able to feel the sweetness in the memories and not just the sadness. But that's just it - it takes time. So much more time than we could ever expect, and more patience then we could ever hope to have. Connecting with other who understand can make a difference and I'm so glad you're here and part of our community. I hope it can be a help to you~