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Missing my dad...

Discussion in 'Loss of a Parent' started by Daisy, Mar 29, 2018.

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  1. Daisy

    Daisy New Member

    On Jan 18th, my dad passed away. He was my best pal. I have 4 kids who adored him (20,18,16,10) and my husband thought of him as a second father. My mom is just a disaster. They were married for 47 years—most of them happy! He was only 69 years old. I am finding it hard to go through my own process while taking care of everyone else. People say “you have to take care of yourself” but it’s not that easy. Then to complicate things, my husband’s father died on Tuesday. I didn’t get along with him very well and didn’t think he was a very nice person but my husband was very loyal to him anyway. He is crushed. I feel sorry for him but I’m out of emotional gas. I feel so much anger—my dad was only 69, his was 85. My dad was a wonderful human being, his dad liked to belittle people, etc. We saw him twice a year, we live 5 minutes away from my parents. I know my feelings are juvenile and irrational and I feel like a rotten human being, but this is how I’m feeling. I feel like I’m expected to get over the loss of my dad so I can help him deal with his. It’s lonely. And the person I talked to about things like this was my dad! He understood me. So...I’m frustrated and so very sad. Hoping that chatting with others will help.
     
    Elspeth Jones likes this.
  2. rosedean

    rosedean New Member

    Hey, Daisy. I lost my dad on Jan 15th, but in 2016. I can definitely relate to you and your frustrations. My dad was only 62 when he passed and he loved my kids so much, and they him. Your feelings are not juvenile! You are entitled to them and you need to know that you never get over the loss, you just learn how to cope with it. Or so I've heard. I'm currently just now grieving apparently and don't know what the hell to do with myself. I realize your post is a few months old, I hope the situation has improved. And if not, that's okay too.