lost the love if my life

Discussion in 'Coping After a Sudden Loss' started by john, Aug 24, 2016.

  1. john

    john Active Member

    I lost the love of my life on april 11 2016
    After coming home from a school play
    Carolyn started throwing up and started getting very dehydriated by Sunday night she was so weak she couldn't talk or walk and I woke up the next morning she was still laying in the recliner I bought her she hasn't moved I tried to revive her and I couldn't she.was already gone.
     
    LindaH likes this.
  2. Gwen

    Gwen New Member

    John - I am so sorry for your loss! I hope that you are able to find comfort and joy in the memories that the two of you made! Most people have told me that the first year is difficult. It's only been a month for me since I lost my husband, and there are times that the reality of it hits like a ton of bricks and I shut down for a time. There are days that I don't accomplish much at work or at home, but the main thing is, I keep going, even when I don't want to or just truly do not care. I hope that you have family close by and that they share their love with you. While this doesn't take away the longing for my husband that I have, it does help me to remember that there are those who still love and care about me! Never forget how much your wife loved you and share that love with those around you. I tell my kids and grandkids, that it is in this way, that our loved ones will live on, in and through each of us! So, grieve, but don't stop living! Allow God to hold you and comfort you as only He can! In time, I know that you (and I) will be ok - not today, and maybe not tomorrow, but someday, we will be ok.
     
    john likes this.
  3. john

    john Active Member

    Gwen the first 2 or 3 weeks I couldn't stay here At the house I stayed at my sons house I finally came
    Back after 3weeks that just wasnt supposed to happen
    She was supposed to get over it Gwen
    Gwen. A wise grief Counslor told me to use the 20 40rule which is only plan on doing 20 percent of what you need to do cause the other 40percent want get done
     
    LindaH and Gwen like this.
  4. john

    john Active Member

    Gwen you need to be gentle and patient with yourself
     
  5. Gwen

    Gwen New Member

    Thanks John. I'm doing ok, or at least I'm making it. One of my daughters and her family live close, so they keep me pretty involved with what they have going on. My son-in-law is super great. He takes care of my yard work and tons of other things! Then every 2-3 weekends, I get to see my other daughter that lives about 3 hours away. My son lives 9 hours away, so I don't get to see him often but I'm trying to make sure we talk or at least text more often. Him and his dad were best friends so this is hard for him, plus he has a hard time not being close enough to "take care of me". I'm pretty well self sufficient but every day I realize another one of those "little things" that Lynn used to do.
     
  6. john

    john Active Member

    I know what you mean Gwen it's the little things that sleek up on us I have my oldest son living with me now until he moves out. And another son that just had a little boy in May that lives bout 4 minutes from my house who chks on me everyday. And I have Carolyn first cousin that has been a ton of help I wouldn't have got done with all I had to do without her and I have a mother widow friend who is a good friend that help also
     
    Gwen likes this.
  7. john

    john Active Member

    Sorry my typing is awful
     
  8. john

    john Active Member

    Gwen you been able to sleep any I got the Dr to order me something to help me sleep