Lost my dad February 1st 2019

Discussion in 'Loss of a Parent' started by Kmurph, Feb 10, 2019.

  1. Kmurph

    Kmurph New Member

    My dad best friend my world passed away unexpectedly Fri February 1st 2019. I just feel so lost empty like part of me died with him. People keep telling me get over it stop crying. Am I not suppose to cry anymore ?? Am I not to feel the way I do ?? Someone tell me how I'm suppose to feel

    Thank u.
    Kmurph
     
  2. Hi I also lost my dad on Feb 5 he had diabetes but this was unexpected . We had tried gettrhim to go to Dr for a while but he was stubborn . He died of cardic arrest we had no idea he had heart problems . he was just 53 and I am 32 I feel so alone and empty and find myself crying still even seeing pictures . I'd like you to know I understand how you feel and would like to continue talking to you
     
  3. Kmurph

    Kmurph New Member




    Hi Andrea
    I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm so glad you replied to me. It's a comfortable feeling knowing I can talk to someone who's going what I'm going through. My dad was my best friend strong man big as life. Without warning he went into cardiac arrest but they brought him back. We didn't think he had heart issues. But he did. I'm angry that he didn't tell me. And I'm still crying everyday wondering if it's gonna get easier
    I've sorta built a wall around me which everyone says isn't good but nobody gets it.
     
  4. I understand where you're coming from my dad had type 1 diabetes and always use insulin and there for a while he was doing really good taking his medicine then all the sudden he started losing eyesight and he couldn't work anymore so now that fell on my mom take care of everything he tried to disability couldn't get it couldn't get Medicaid so it was hard for him to get his insulin he hated going to the doctor and he hadn't been to the doctor in a very long time and then here within the last couple of weeks he started having trouble breathing and I kind of figured that it was something up and me and my sisters and my mom tried our hardest to get him to go to the doctor I mean we begged and pleaded but at this time it was like he'd give it up and a couple days before he died he just slept all the time and the night he died my mom called 911 cause he had collapsed in the bathroom they got him stable took him to hospital which was like 5 min away and they tried for 30 min to do CPR it was too late. I was and always will be a daddy's girl and my so broken right now idk how I'll make it
     
  5. Kmurph

    Kmurph New Member

    Andrea
    My dad dropped in the bank they did CPR brought him back he was on a ventalor for 3 weeks he knew we my brothers and i were there finally we saw hope he came off the vent I thought we won the fight but the day before I was going to see him he passed my brothers are married have older kids me I'm by myself my dad became my best friend saw him everyday talked to him 3 4 times a day on the phone now nothing my brothers have there little support but I'm just here my heart like yours is broken I don't know if it will ever heal. A tiny part of me is angry because he held back information from me. That's the part that really sucks
     
  6. I'm sure he didn't want to hurt you by telling you he was sick because y'all were so close he hated to hurt you. Reach out to you family they all share the same greif and hopefully you all can Cope
     
  7. Terrie_

    Terrie_ New Member


    No one can tell you how to feel. But if it helps this is how i feel... you may be able to relate and my inbox is open if you want to talk more...
    ... my dad left us with no warning and im angry
    Im angry that the doctors couldnt do more
    Im angry that i live an hour away and i couldnt get there in time
    Im angry that everyone else seems to have just accepted that he is no longer here and that everyone else has moved on
    Im mad at myself because i cant accept that hes gone
    Im sad that im the girl whos dad died
    Im sad that my dad wont be at my wedding in september and wont be there when i have children
    I cry all the time, then none of the time. Im fine for days... weeks... then i crumble
    I hate that i feel i have to hide how i feel from people i love because they dont understand and all they can say is "im sorry" or "i know its hard"... NO! You dont know its hard. You dont know because your dad is still alive and mine died and left me without me having any chance to say goodbye.

    Im so fed up of feeling like this but it doesnt get any easier and i feel so alone in my grief. Ive done grief councelling. It didnt help. I just feel annoyed at the councellor for her trying to find out my precious memories which she has no right to know.

    I know i should be over the "angry" stage by now. And often i am. But i keep going back to it. I get sad. And angry. And you are not alone in the way you feel. Xx