Lost my cousin who was also a best friend

I recently lost my cousin to cancer in February. She was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer when it was caught. She was such an beautiful person, inside and out. I still find her passing hard to accept because she was young, she was 22. We spent a lot of our lives with miles between us but I would go visit and I would spend most of my time with her. I had decided to move up here where my boyfriend and family live. My cousin and I were excited because that meant we would be living together and we had a lot of plans. Unfortunately, by the time I moved up here, she was already in the hospital. It still feels unreal that she is no longer here and that all our plans just vanished. It breaks my heart that she wasn’t able to create a family and that she won’t be able to meet mine. After her passing, I’m having a hard time believing that life is... real? It doesn’t make sense how someone like her was taken so early. It’s so hard to not be able to talk to her.