Lost both parents 7 months apart. Having a hard time coping

Discussion in 'Loss of Both Parents' started by Kymber73, Jul 24, 2019.

  1. Kymber73

    Kymber73 New Member

    I am new here. I lost my mother ( who was my best friend) 3 months ago and I lost my father 10 months ago. I never had time to grieve the loss of my father because instantly I became my mother's caregiver, then unexpectedly lost my mother 7 months and 5 days after my father. I am now grieving the loss of both parents and am just not coping well.
     
  2. kathipro

    kathipro New Member

    I just joined. I'm 65 years old and this year, have experienced first major death losses. My mother was early in the year, an unexpected event, although she was elderly at 86. I live in MA and she lived in UT, where my sister also lives. I flew out there when things went amiss and was there a week and a half and with her when she died. My father, who lived in GA, died 3 weeks ago after suffering kidney cancer & disease. It was expected, of course. One of my closest friends (husband of my dearest friends) died unexpectedly 2 weeks from a UTI that went into sepsis. My parents weren't in my daily life since they lived in other states but it's still very hard to realize they are gone. And that my local friend died.
     
  3. Ejv

    Ejv New Member

    I am new today. My dad died on November 29 and my mum a week later which was unexpected and an awful death of total liver and kidney failure. My dad had bowel cancer so we knew . My mother turned on me throughout his illness , wouldn't allow help with my father which led to him not being cared for as much as was possible until he had to go into a palliative care centre. The last 4 days of his life she would not leave his room, shouted when i spoke to him or stroked or touched him , told me he had said he didn't want me there. It was horrendous. Then the next day she was admiited as an emergency and 4 days later we were told she had 2 days to live. She had told friends I had not helped which was the opposite of the truth . When in hospital she spoke that I had visited and tried to murder her. She deteriorated quickly and never smiled at me or said sorry just stared . In the last hours she tried to speak but it could not be understood . I feel she died still angry . I am totally broken and would welcome advice from anyone who has similar experience .
    EJV