Lost and overwhelmed

That is such a very good question...I think that's a great challenge that many grievers face. How do we care for others (especially a very young child!) when we're grieving too? Caring for a young child takes a tremendous amount of energy and patience - two things you may not feel you have a lot of right now. The first step is to recognize the limitations you may be facing and acknowledging them as a normal part of the grieving process. Get help anywhere you can - immediate family if that's available, friends, and neighbors, other parents at daycare if that's an option. You will need time to rest and having a break periodically will be important. Remember how important it is to take care of yourself - that's hard for all mothers to do, but we are better because of it and our children benefit when we are taking care of ourselves. Next, recognize how necessary it is for your son to get an honest look at grief. As a society I think we suffer because grief can be treated like a dirty secret - something that should be kept to ourselves and behind closed doors. Even at 2 years old, your son knows that something has happened and something is wrong. You can talk to him about your loss (even if it doesn't seem that he understands), and it is okay to cry in front of him. Of course, there does have to be a balance, and the wonderful gift of having a young child in your life at a time of extreme sadness and loss is that they will provide such an important reminder of how sweet life can be. Just when you're feeling very low, I would guess he'll do something extra sweet to make you feel better. If you start talking to your son now you will be able to keep a conversation open for years to come. You didn't mention who you lost but I'm assuming it is someone who also loved your son. While he may not get the chance to know this person in the way you would have hoped, you can make sure that by always talking about them, your loved one can still be a part of your son's life. Finally, forgive yourself any time you feel you're falling short. Parenting is hard enough and we're all doing the best we can. And that's all you can continue to do. Find time and space for your grief both with him and separate from him. Don't be too hard on yourself, know that your son loves you and you don't have to be "perfect" for him all the time.
I'm glad you've reached out and hope this can be of some help to you. If you have any further questions or issues you'd like to discuss, keep in touch. We'd like to hear how you're doing. We're here to help~