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Lost 7 family members in the last few years

Discussion in 'Dealing With Multiple Losses' started by alice frerichs, Feb 11, 2019.

  1. alice frerichs

    alice frerichs New Member

    I've had some major losses in the past few years. It started with my mom, she died of a slow bleed aneurism. A few months later my youngest daughter was killed in a hunting accident. Next was my brother, polio complications. Then was my husband. They really never nailed down why he died. Three months later my sister died of cancer. Thanksgiving day another sister died of a heart attack. Then my father-in-law died while having knee surgery.
    I'm scared to grieve for them. It seems to overwhelming. If I let go I may never find my way out. I don't sleep much because when I sleep I dream of them. Dreaming of them is so bittersweet. I don't want the dreams to end but when I wake it hurts so much it's hard to breathe. Everyone thinks I'm so strong. I smile and keep on going. But inside I feel like I could shatter into small pieces.
    I want my life back. I want to find some happiness agian. Not just pretend I'm happy.
     
    APurpleReign likes this.
  2. Maria GCD

    Maria GCD New Member

    Wow! That’s a lot to process. I can relate in some ways. I lost a close favorite uncle in June 2017. Then my mom is July 2018, my mother in law in January and a close family friend is have known all of my life passed two weeks ago. Although all had illnesses I feel their losses. I want to call hem and share stuff with them but cannot. I realize they are not suffering any longer since all were suffering before they died. However the losses are still there. I have days where my do not want to do anything but that’s not an option. So I push on. I’m a new member and I hope to find a common place to share and get support while supporting others.
     
  3. APurpleReign

    APurpleReign Member

    I love the statement about "never finding your way out'. You have suffered major losses and I understand the feeling of "if I let go and really look at it", I may not come back.....