I recently lost my mother to COPD. I lost both of my dog as well during my mothers decline in health. I am really struggling as my family at home is not a viable source of support. They deal with death very differently than I do. I am a very emotional person and they dont quite know how to handle it. My mother was a single parent to me all my life and she was also an alcoholic. When her COPD progressed to the point that we knew the end was close I followed her wishes and kept her at home where she wanted to be. She lived with me for the past 7 years. We did home hospice and I was her cargiver. My siblings were estranged from her for many years so I was alone in caring for her. We started home hospice on a saturday and she passed the following thursday. I have really struggled with her passing as I have never lost someone this close to me before. I am struggling with the fact that the last for days of her life were so unbelievably hard to watch and it now haunts me. I feel very alone and dont know what to do with all my emotions. I have been in a relationship with a gentleman for over nine years who is very good to me. He has three kids 2 are adults and a 15 year old. I am unbelievably hurt as I have always been there for these kids when they went through some really bad situations. It has broke my heart as they claimed to care about me so much but I have never heard a word from them when and since my mom passed. I never realized someone not acknowledging what I am going through could hurt so much. I also am struggling with the fact that my mother destroyed her health willingly. I constantly have the question in my mind why wasnt I enough to make her happy and love life. She hated life and couldnt destroy herself fast enough no matter who it hurt. I am so lost alone and broken right now.