I am so broken. My baby boy left this world way too soon on 9.26.18. His name was Oliver. I woke up, and he didn’t. It’s not fair. I have a 5-year-old and I am struggling so bad to be a good mom to him right now.
I am so sorry for your loss. The sudden loss of a child is something no parent ever wants to face, and it can be especially difficult to find supportive people who understand. I'm glad you have come here for help, and I always think that no matter how bad it seems, reaching out is a sign that you're doing better than you think (because there are some who are too frozen in grief to reach out at all). We've addressed the issue of loss, and how it affects parenting in our most recent blog. I'm including that here, and hope it can be a help to you: https://www.griefincommon.com/blog/caring-for-children-after-loss/. Thank you for joining us, I truly hope you find the support and comfort you need~
I am so sorry for your loss. I understand what you are feeling. I lost my baby Kendra 10 days after she was born. It wasn't SID, she had a virus that went to her heart (we later found out). There were no signs of her being ill. At the time I remember wanting to die. At the time my other daughter was 2 yrs old. Trying to be a good mother to her ...how does one get through ? I didn't have support, not even from my husband who didn't want me to cry ....my grief was pushed down deep inside of me. This was way back in 1980. The following year I gave birth to my son David. I was so afraid something wold happen to him. I was not in the best emotional shape for the first six months of his life. How did I get through the sudden loss of Kendra? Let me tell you. Before she was born I wanted to decorate her room with rainbows A couple of days after she died, it rained ...I went outside when it stopped...stretched out over my house was a beautiful rainbow. I was so moved, so in awe. To me this was a sign from God. This event brought me closer to God. It doesn't seem fair, yet all things work together for good for those who love God. How good of a mom was I back then tor my two yr old? I did the best I could. That's all we can do..and leave the rest to the Lord. I am sure you are a wonderful mom to your son. Ask God to help you and He will. I started reading the Bible back then.It helped me. Nobody talked about Kendra. It's like everyone stayed away. I did have one good friend who had us showed her kindness, inviting us for an amazing dinner after Kendra died. Kendra and Oliver are safe in Heaven. We will see them again I believe. I got away from reading the Bible for a long time, but I am back to reading now. I pray you will have peace and healing.
