Illness did not prepare me for the loss of my husband 11 days ago. Even when he was sick, I saw his smile every morning and every evening and received the kisses he blew to me whenever I came into the room. He was always there for me emotionally and was my greatest supporter. Now he is gone. He died suddenly over 12 hours going from having a conversation with me about every day things to being dead. Has anyone felt this way- that illness does not "train" you for the actual death of your loved one?