My only brother passed away when I was 10 years old, in 1986 so for the past 30+ years its been just my parents and me. My mom was diagnosed with Parkinsons and Dementia, about 5 years ago, and her condition worsened over the past two years. Her dementia caused her to fall out of bed in 2017 and break her him, and after that she struggled walking and relied heavily on my dad. My dad was her primary caretaker, and did such an amazing job caring for her. My parents lived in the Bronx, New York City and I lived not too far away in Brooklyn. I would see them as much as I could, but when New York was issued our stay at home order, I last saw them around March 10th. I would call and speak to my dad mostly, at least twice a week, as my mom was sleeping more and more. I remember calling them Sunday April 5th, and got extremely emotional when I finally spoke to my mom. She was somewhat coherent and I told her how much I loved and missed her. She had no idea what was going on, but said she missed me too, and handed the phone back to my dad saying "something is wrong with him, he seems sad" Tuesday, April 7th, I did my usual morning routine which included a workout After my workout I called my dad to check up. For 3 hours no answer, when I decide to take the trip. I was confronted with my biggest nightmare. My dad was healthy, strong, alert and dedicated the last few years of his life caring for mom. He had suffered a heart attack sometime the night before and because my mom was bedridden, and pretty much unaware of anything, she couldnt call for help for god knows how long. Its an image I cannot forget. Mom was taken to a hospital and eventually transferred to a nursing home on April 10th. This past Sunday, the nursing home called and said my mom was running a fever, later that night her breathing was shallow. I was able to skype with her yesterday at around 1 PM. She was staring into space and I knew she heard me, but didn't respond. She passed away at around 5 PM. I know this is all fresh, and it will take some time for me to process all of this. I never expected to lose both my parents, never thought I would lose my dad first, and never thought I couldn't be as close to them as I wish I could. As strong as I am for the rest of the family, I'm broken, hurting, sad and have to cope in isolation. I guess thats why I came here, to connect with people who are also grieving. I'm just so lost right now.