*DAYTIME AND EVENING GENERAL GRIEF GROUPS AVAILABLE EVERY WEEK* CLICK HERE TO JOIN US!

Its been 4 1/2 months since I lost my husband and I feel so alone.

Discussion in 'Grief in Common Updates, Questions & Answers' started by Allie22, Jan 29, 2018.

  1. Allie22

    Allie22 New Member

    I feel so alone and it's been 4 1/2 months since I lost my husband. I cried off and on yesterday and cried myself to sleep. I feel like I will never be happy again. I have 3 children and I have to keep pushing on for them. I woke up this morning crying and I can't go to work like this. I haven't been this emotional since the day I lost my husband. I just want to lay in my bed and cry!
     
    Joy Strathman likes this.
  2. griefic

    griefic Administrator Staff Member

    Hi Allie~ I'm sorry you've had such an especially hard day. Grief is unpredictable like that. It doesn't necessarily get easier the more time that passes. In fact in the beginning I think we are protected by the fog we're in - everything is so surreal, the loss doesn't even really sink in. But after a few months (perhaps right around the time you're in now) the fog lifts a bit, some of the numbness wears off, and the reality starts to settle in. You're not alone in this feeling, and while I can't give you a timeline of how this is going to go, or how long this acute pain will last, I can tell you that not every day of grieving will be like this. There will be good mornings and bad afternoon. Bad mornings that turn into okay nights...
    And while time is not a healer in the sense that it totally takes our grief away, time does help to soften the grief (or at least time gives us the chance to adapt to the loss and the change in some ways).
    I think having people along with us on this journey is one of the only things that really makes a difference or has an impact on how well we're going to cope, so I'm glad you are reaching out.
    There are people here who understand, and we are here to help. We truly wish you all the best~ please keep in touch and let us know how you are doing.
     
    Belovedbyjim likes this.
  3. MrsJane

    MrsJane New Member

    Hi, I'm Jane,I also lost my husband 9 months ago..This is the hardest thing I have ever had to go thru.I will say I get lonely but I have become very stand offish,I truly feel like no one cares.
     
  4. Belovedbyjim

    Belovedbyjim Member

    Hi, I’m new here. I lost my husband to a diving accident 3 months ago. I’ve been suffering from anxiety which I never did before. I drove my car too close to the sidewalk and got a flat tire and panicked. I have decided to go into a job interview (that they approached me for), after not working for 15 years. And that interview is tomorrow. I cannot believe I’m such a total wreck. When will it get easier?
     
  5. Belovedbyjim

    Belovedbyjim Member

    So sorry to hear, Jane.
     
  6. Belovedbyjim

    Belovedbyjim Member

    Allie, I can relate a bit. Every night I cry. But tomorrow I have a job interview and I don’t want to go in with puffy eyes. My kids are grown but I do have a new 6 day old granddaughter. I’m trying to be positive for my family
     
  7. Belovedbyjim

    Belovedbyjim Member

    What you wrote to Allie is so comforting. I never thought I would ever be in this position. Losing my best friend, my husband. I hope others will reach out to me and help me on this journey of grief. I’m trying to help my children through their own grief, yet I can hardly deal with mine.