I don’t understand why 30 is a struggle

I lost my first husband 29 years ago. Tomorrow would have been our 30th wedding anniversary. We didn’t get to celebrate a single one. Of all the ones that have gone by why am I having such difficulty with this one? I’ve had sleepless nights for a good 2 months over this day coming. It’s tearing me up inside.

 

I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t say why all the sudden you’re having a difficult time. But it’s ok, let it happen. Cry and talk of him, remember him for the wonderful times you had together. It’s a sad time but do your best to think of happy times. All the anniversaries I’ve dreaded since I lost my husband 20 months ago, they’ve all gone better then my mind conjured up. Not great but I didn’t pass out either. I’m hoping that happens for you too.
All the best to you, be strong but let your emotions happen.