Hostile family

Discussion in 'Coping After a Sudden Loss' started by Vanessa 2, Jun 6, 2020.

  1. Vanessa 2

    Vanessa 2 New Member

      1. My companion of about 10 years passed away 4 months ago. He lived alone and suffered cardiac arrest and died almost immediately. We had initially considered marriage but after some time settled for companionship. He always told me I was his best friend, confidante, mentor and that Noone else understood him better. We shared a lot of things and spent a lot of time together but couldn't take the relationship higher because he had a tendency of cheating now and again. I accepted that we would remain companions though there are times we had differences over his ways. In spite of all this he insistediI was the only one he wanted to be committed to. He had a condition called deep vein thrombosis for one year and I gave him all the support he needed while his family didn't. Now he is gone some of his family say he was not going to die alone if I hadn't been in his life. He was going to find someone else. One went to the extent of saying maybe he suffered the cardiac arrest because of our relationship. They are giving a very exaggerated version of our ocassional differences. Now in addition to mourning the loss of a departed friend I have these bitter feelings. It's killing me.
     
  2. JoNas

    JoNas Member

    Hi Vanessa.That family sounds horrible. I lost my Mom,and have no more family. So,hopefully people on this site are my human family.
    Please don't let his family get to you.Probably toxic people.You alone know the relationship you had with your friend.My deepest sympathy to you.
     
  3. Vanessa 2

    Vanessa 2 New Member

    Hi Jonas. Thanks so much for your encouraging words. Truly they have proved to be very toxic people. Even some of those who I thought were friends turned against me. Imagine his sister who, even as late as one week before he passed away, kept insisting I should marry the brother never spoke to me the entire funeral period todate. You are right I should not let this family get to me. I am seriously trying to do so hard as it is. I thank you a lot for your kind thoughts.
     
  4. JoNas

    JoNas Member

    Hi Vanessa. You're more than welcome.All of our sorrow is awful.I'my battling everyday to just be without my Mother and best friend.
     
  5. Vanessa 2

    Vanessa 2 New Member

    Hello JoNas
    Am so sorry about your loss of your mum and best friend. Did they depart recently? Sorrow is indeed awful. Sometimes it feels like it will never go away. But I guess it does ease at some stage and the memories are no longer with pain. I guess we just need to continue trying to stay strong. Once more thanks for reaching out JoNas.
     
  6. JoNas

    JoNas Member

    member: 16186"]Hello JoNas
    Am so sorry about your loss of your mum and best friend. Did they depart recently? Sorrow is indeed awful. Sometimes it feels like it will never go away. But I guess it does ease at some stage and the memories are no longer with pain. I guess we just need to continue trying to stay strong. Once more thanks for reaching out JoNas.[/QUOTE]
    Mom is/was the best friend too.☺
     
  7. Vanessa 2

    Vanessa 2 New Member

    Mom is/was the best friend too.☺[/QUOTE]
    OH dear me I see. So truly sorry.
     
  8. JoNas

    JoNas Member

    OH dear me I see. So truly sorry.[/QUOTE]
    Yeah..