I was wondering if after a year or so that if I am feeling a bit better and not thinking of my loss every day but say 2 or 3 days a week, am I hap- py or happier than I was say 6 months ago. Happy to me being happy just about all the time where as happier could relate to another point in time, such as not as happy then as I am now. Could this mean I am happier than I was but not as much as I was 2 yrs ago? Guess I'll have to see how I feel in another year or so.
It's only been a little over 6 months since I lost my husband and there are times where I can look forward to things and feel good about it, I can say that I can feel happy about the good things in my life and grateful for them but there are still times where I miss him so much that I actually feel pain in my heart and I think sometimes that I'm always going to feel this way. I wish with all my heart and soul that he was still here with me but I have to start to think ahead and make a happy life for myself and my children because that is what he would want me to do as much as it hurts and is painful to even think of any future without him, it has to become easier at some point. The loneliness, even being surrounded by family, friends and so many loved ones, is the worst feeling ever, I don't think anything can take that away. You're not happy, but you are happier than you were, I know what you mean when you question that, we aren't happy about where we are but we become used to it and I think that's ok. I wish you well and all the best.
Dear Rosaria, Sorry I am so late getting back to you... So much was going on. . . got my own place so mon an dad r glad. It has been rough, losing my wife and a future w her and relocating 1700 miles. No 1 in family ever askt if I'd like to talk. In a few wks It will have been a yr. How are you doing Rosaria? I know how much it hurts. We can not accept the loss till our ❤ does. It is such a cut an dry lesson of knowing your loss on a level of mentaly but as we.know, the ❤ takes a longer time to accept a loss of deep love. I still find it hard to believe that no one in the family has asked me if I want to talk. If I asked it would go right to religion and all the reasons I should be happy. It is like a sin to be unhappy in the family. No need to be unhappy. If u would like to write me, Feel free and I will get right back to you. Sincerely, Ray G.
