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  1. Anjadim

    Anjadim Member

    I lost my husband four months ago. It seems like yesterday. We were married for 40 years and were truly in love. He died during Covid so I wasn’t allowed to have a viewing or anything. They gave me and my children an half an hour to see him and then we went to the cemetery. I was just so mad at everyone and everything. Now we are having a memorial in August and I know this is going to be so hard. I can’t sleep,I’m depressed and I cry every nite. I need to make peace with god but right now I just can’t. He didn’t even have the chance to get one session of chemo. My heart breaks every night.
     
  2. Sweetcole

    Sweetcole Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry for your loss. Covid has really put a damper on things. I lost my fiancee almost 4 months ago. Due to covid I couldnt be by his side. Nights are hard for me too. I think about him so much and lately I'm more emotional than normal. I have small kids and they are my motivation. I pray that you have strength to get through the upcoming memorial service as well as each day.
     
  3. edj9

    edj9 Well-Known Member

    Oh, it breaks my heart to read about not being able to be with your loved ones because of this damned pandemic. I’m sooooo sorry. I simply cannot imagine the depths of grief you must be in.
     
  4. skies24

    skies24 Well-Known Member

    My heart breaks for you. I wish I had something magical to say but all I have is I’m sorry. Just an idea but maybe buy a bench if you have a yard and have it dedicated to your husband. I find myself wanting a spot to just talk to her. Or if not your yard someplace that you two loved to go. I’m thinking once I get settled (new place) that’s what I’m going to do. I really wish I could say something to ease the pain.
     
  5. skies24

    skies24 Well-Known Member

    And as for your anger with God. I think That is to be expected. Take your time. It’s a struggle. I hope you find peace.