Mark, Susie, your wife was beautiful. I love that you shared that with us all. This is a tribute video of my wife:
Please press the button under my wife's picture titled Play Tribute Movie
https://www.dignitymemorial.com/obituaries/auburn-me/nadine-hughes-6409908 That video was made by her older sister Linda, and I am so grateful.
Mark, Life and love, such a pair, we move through our lives not knowing where it will take us, you might have a plan or not, but when you find the perfect love, it is as if it has been sent by God. Your life changes, you make your plans for the future, and you live through time with one another. Sure, we are all diminished when we lose the one who we hold so dearly.
After Nadine died, I didn’t search for why, I searched for everything that helped me face the soleness, and all that was so pure of her in life. I have a lot of posts here on these forums where I can’t help but profess my love I so wholly shared with her.
Before she left this mortal coil we call Earth, knowing she had cancer, Nadine had the opportunity for a trip to Hawaii, with all girls, family and friends from her life. She took so many pictures, I have many moments alone with those pictures, and there were tears of hapiness that swelled within me for all the love she shared with all those girls. I know they knew her time was limited so it was a special time in all their lives.
When she returned, she beamed, she showed me all the pictures, told me all the stories, it was wonderful. She had left a part of herself with them all. Mark you are correct, cancer did not win.
How true it is about being open with loss. As you talk, this grief we all share gets easier with time. Holding it inside us eats us up.
Before I closed Facebook.com I have written daily posts of thoughts about Nadine, over a couple of months. Her niece Lisa, collected all of them and promised to share all of them forward. When my account was almost hacked, it was at that point I closed Facebook.com, otherwise I would have kept it open.
Being able to have others to talk openly is a saving grace. We all need that, and if only more people could reach out in our world, perhaps we would not be in such troubled times. You will find as you read others posts on this site, they too are touched by loss, and fully understand the depth of sorrow it can put us in. By talking and being open, their tears may be plenty, but they are loving tears, those tears help them heal inside, and allow others who read their words to also open up and start to heal.
I think what elated me the most was my discovery of how in depth Youtube.com has become. Like google, you only need to put in a few words to a song to find it, or a word or two for a certain type of song for any occasion, especially loss.
I will say that is what kept me going many days. So I started to collect music again that I can access on my television. I can’t say enough for how music drives me, and I know Bill has immense knowledge of music as well.
I just know, when an emotion rises, or a thought makes me wonder, I just turn on my computer, search for something to fit my feelings and then feel better for having done so when I find those special videos or music.
I also make an effort to post comments to artists who I have listened to, to let them know I appreciate their effort. When they cover songs, I listen first to the original artist, then their interpretation, and tell them about my feelings of it. I have conversed with some artists about their songs back and forth.
I often wondered if the dreams we have is our dearly departed reaching out. I just know I am lucky to not remember the bad ones only the ones I feel make me happier inside.
Mark, I too have seen a loved one many times in my life. How you grow from that experience is who you become as a person. How you move forward in life after death can go in many directions. Faith is what I always reach back upon.
Mark, I hope you will find healing, and keep reaching out. Thank you for your song as well, his songs are part of my collection.
The Celebration of Life is amazing. Artists always astound me when they put their emotions in their songs and then can sing it so beautifully. Take this song for instance:
I am sure your performance will be one to watch, if they make a video of it, please post a link after for us all here.
For now, please take care, and may peace be with you forward in life.
-david
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