Valentine is Dead!

Deb,
Remember that I planted Apple trees last fall? One for Kenn and one for me. I chose varieties that would be producing fruit around the anniversary of his death.
March is a wonderful time for spring flowers. I wonder if you might buy yourself a pot of Spring bulbs, daffodils or something that would come up year after year near the anniversary days in March and April. Fewer calories than cake and take almost no work.
Although a chocolate eclair with your morning coffee while admiring your flowers might be pretty special too.
I’m certain that whatever you choose to do will be just right because it will be perfectly you, even in it’s impossible imperfect time of year.
~Bernadine

 

Karen, I understood what you meant about
the 1st sad anniversary of a soulmate's
death. I was practically in the drunk tank,
as you know. The 2nd anniversary was
bad, too. My drinking just made me MORE
depressed. My grief counselor wisely
suggested I give up drinking, & I listened
to her advice & quit . I feel better
physically, & for the most part, mentally.
Mr.Grief makes me cry unexpectedly, on
occasion, but I don't weep like I did, after

Linda died. That's why I said to George if
he can just get through this weekend, &
see his son & his girlfriend, it does get
better, as I told you. Lou

 

Speaking of firsts I had a few right in a row the past few weeks. Our anniversary, my birthday, and Valentines day. It was pretty rough and I was pretty sad. My neice came over and sat with me for a bit and cried with me for a bit. It did help a little. Her birthday will be in July and the one year mark will be in October. We have been talking about doing another celebration of life in October which I like. And I may visit her sister in July, and have a Lizzy day. I am not even sure how to make to year at this point.

-Chad

 

Chad, thank you for sharing your story
about the sad anniversary of Lizzy's
death. I think a celebration of life is a
great idea. I did it, informally, on the 3rd
anniversary of Linda's death. It was a hell
of a lot better than the 1st & 2nd, when I
was alone, and drinking. I'm glad your
niece came over to be with you. It's good
to have someone to listen & to comfort
you. Your plans sound good, Chad. Lou

 

Good morning George. I thought you might like this read. The part where using our imagination is critical is very important to me. Be strong younger brother. You can do it Ampelopie. I love you Bro.

 

Thanks man... today is ONE YEAR. I miss her so much

 

George. I feel for you. As I told you.
anniversaries of our soulmates SUCK,
especially the 1st one. Will you see your
son & his girlfriend today? Lou

 

Oh I see them everyday cuz I live with them, or they live with me. Gary sent me a cool message comparing my life with that of Prometheus. I just need to get through each and ev'ry day and find my imagination. Maybe paint up some art too. I will be strong. At least a one day break from incessant cold!

 

George,

Lou already said it, It SUCKS!!!, TU!!!…. No words of wisdom, no advice, just sending lots of hugs, love, your way…

Wishing you peace, all of us peace. DEB

 

No worries! I can't help but feel my years of 21 through 55 were just a weird dream... Was I really married, did I have someone who unconditionally loved me? So Surreal today!

 

I appreciate your very kind thoughts and hugs on this very weird day

 

George, you & I have a lot in common,
about our relationships with our wives.
Linda & I had unconditional love for
other, like you & Valerie did. But, it wasn't
all rosy. Like Valerie, Linda had an
unhappy childhood, & didn't trust, or
like most people, especially when she
became ill & bitter. For some reason,
she still loved me, & said I was the only
reason she was hanging on. Sadly, that
wasn't enough in the end. Even
Jonathan, in his book, had marriage
counseling at one point, in their 40
years together. So glad you're replying
to TGW today, or we'd worry about you.
Lou

 

George, I'm glad you're not alone today.
I liked Gary's story about suffering, too.
All TGW can relate to that! Your idea to
paint is great. I remember when we
"met", being impressed by your art,
bc I sucked at it. My passion was, & is,
writing. If we lose our imagination,
creativity, & sense of humor, we get very
old -----fast. Lou

 

It has been particularly hard to re-kindle my imagination stream. but I still try. I'm glad you like my art. I don't know truly if it is any good or I just like it cuz itz mine. I don't know how to connect with and meet people anymore.

 

Don't know what to say but I'm here and living

 

George, today's Center for Loss quote
reminds me of you, on this extremely
sad day. It's by Charles M. Schulz, the
creator of Charlie Brown : "I've
developed a new philosophy, one only
dread day at a time". That applies to all
of us. Lou

 

Thatz a great quote!

 

Glad you like it, George. Knew you
would! Lou

 

Thanks bro

 

we brothers watch out for each other!!