Still grieving after 1.5 years....what is wrong with me?

Personally speaking, I think grieving for someone very long time that is not a problem, our loved ones passed away, grieving them makes me feel they’re still with me and I’m being loved.

 

hi bob sorry for loss. my wife of 44 yrs pased away jan 15 this year. i am still mess. friends have gone they dont want to hear it i guess. everything i loved musuc drinkin great food companunship over. how /why do i go on ?

 

Firstly, I think we don’t have to feel guilty about grieving the passed ones, it’s someone you loved passed away so it’s normal to not highly functioned as you used to be. We can miss them or having a crying session. Secondly, I think when we grieving enough, we can feel balanced more than we’re not grieving at all. Hope this can help you.

 

I am so sorry for your loss, I also lost my mom suddenly, killed by a drunk driver, on November 18, 2023. I can relate to a responder who said year two was almost harder. Life moves on, people, family, everyone seems to be ok and expecting you to be like you were before the devastation. It’s overwhelming. I also still cry every morning and night, and in between she is always on my mind. There isn’t a moment I don’t want to share something with her, giggle, talk about an issue or just hear or see her. I reach for my phone expecting to see her face, or hear her voice or read a funny meme or listen to her new favorite music. I cuddle her dog, now my dog, every day. We sit in silence together, lean on each other, like I cannot do with the people and family in my life.
I hope you are feeling a little more light each day and know more time has passed.

 

l can so relate to every word you wrote,it’s been a yr and half and l can’t get off this roller coaster.Just when l think l can do it,it smacks me right in the face.
I am sorry for your loss also.

 

Hi Sailor21 im extending my condolences to you. So sorry that your cousin is insensitive and outright wrong for what he/she said to you. Sounds like you and your mom had a very strong and loving relationship which is touching to me. My mom is still alive and kicking at 75 years old and drives me crazy with her constant complaining and nagging. Me and my mom have a love hate relationship for as long as I can remember. She’s a control freak and it’s either her way or no way. Always has to be right and she’s never wrong. Never apologizes and never says she’s sorry when it’s her fault. She has a lot of health ailments but still manages to take care of herself and maintains a clean home. I don’t visit her because all she does is tell me how much she hates living where she’s at, she’s lonely, she has no friends or family to talk to, she hates her cat cuz it’s a job and she’s fed up with having diabetes. I don’t know how much longer she’ll be around but I’ll make an attempt to visit her a couple times a month.

 

Life passes so quickly and yet relationships can be challenging. Maybe your mom just needs to talk to someone who can listen. She puts it on you because you are her child and maybe assumes unconditional love. Perhaps next time you visit, sit down with her and ask her what’s troubling her. Let her talk. All you have to do is restate, no need to try to give advice, just restate what she says and actively listen. Give her an hour, tell her you love her then go about your day. Try it one time and if it doesn’t work to stay neutral atleast you tried.

 

I’m sorry for your loss as well. I’m glad your have her dog. ❤️

 

I’m sorry for your loss as well! It’s nice to hear you have her dog.