I miss her so much

Gary, Thank you for correcting my mistake. I was trying to answer from memory. Foggy brain! Bing Crosby and David Bowie, Little Drummer Boy! Such a favorite. Ron LOVED that one, me too. I’ve had trouble listening to it. All I can picture is how much Ron loved it. We watched them perform it on Bings Christmas special. Our first Christmas as a married couple if I remember correct. Robin

 

Long Island University--Liu.

 

You got me, Karen!! Your daughter may be
watching YOU, "like a hawk", but I think
you're watching ME, to see if I need to
go into assisted living. Lou

 

So gosh darn funny you are Lou.

 

Dogs give such unconditional love, I'm sure I will have another one some day. They do make us smile, and hopefully laugh too. Miss Foxy, miss Sheila. Thanks. Rick

 

Thank you, Karen, for keeping me on my
toes, and not take myself too seriously.
Linda was good that way, too. After
dinner, I felt waves of sadness, with
images of Linda, doing mundane things
like charging our old phone at night. She
taught me so much. I know that I thanked
her, but I wish I could do it one more
time. I guess all TGW would love to
have "one more time". Since that's
impossible here on earth, I said a little
prayer to Linda that I missed her, loved
her, and that someday , our spirits would
join. It took its' emotional toll, and I
fell into bed, for a 2 hour sleep, from
7:30 to 9:30pm, my time. When I awoke
just now, it was wonderful to. see you and
Bernadine on here. You always give me a
lift. GIC has become an essential part of
my life. The friends, like you, Karen, who are always there for me, are more profound than anyone I know. Lou

 

Lou, thank you. I consider you "everyone's guy". You know what I mean, your friendship is loved by everyone.

I see how Linda teased the heck out of you. One only teases one who is teasable. Cherish those moments.

Linda knows and hears your prayers. Her body is gone, but not her spirit. Think about it, the after life must be heavenly and that's where our love ones are. Do we weep, yes. Do they want us to weep, no. So we carry on our journey grieving for the day our weeping will become less and less knowing our love will get us through.

Well, I got on an emotional trip here.

Until next time, good night everyone's guy.

 

Karen, I agree with your thoughts of the afterlife. I can't hardly wait to be with my Love, Sheila, once again. And so many other friends and relatives worshipping the Lord in Heaven. That's what I believe, and that is what is carrying me through to the next day. But it is still so hard to go on. I'm not on the net much, the Holidays were very rough. Hope everyone is doing ok, hope and peace to all. Rick

 

I feel like such a F'd up mess since I moved. I know it'll get better I just have to be patient while I keep trying to be me. It's great to read all the comments on here.

 

Well it's almost NYE and I can't help but think how we used to toast in the new year with sparkling grape cider stuff in those wine glasses and how you'd always make avocado dip and always say its a new year hope this year is better, Now the wine glasses are at goodwill you are in a box and I hate everything lately. I emember you always being in charge of charging the old cell phones.

 

George, I'm not in a good mood yet. I'm
still exhausted. 3rd gray day , but I'm
forcing myself to walk to bus, so I can
get a haircut from a young woman , who
always makes me laugh. Lou

 

Remember, George, New Year's is only one
damn day. It was also our wedding in Las
Vegas 3 years ago. Lou

 

That's cool. I used to have vibrant young people in my life!

 

Reading old journals from 12 years ago. Such a different world. I can't believe it is over with. It is too weird really.

 

After reading the posts from my four brothers I was inspired to listen to the song rainy days and Mondays always get me down by the carpenters. I’m in the same mood as everyone else. But after listening to the lyrics “funny but it seems I always wind up here with you. Run and find the one who loves me”. The one who loves me is TGW. We are not alone. We are always here for each other through the worst times of our lives. I was looking forward to my in person grief meeting today but significant snow is forecasted at rush hour. I’m going to monitor the weather before traveling. It seems like ending the year is bringing extra darkness. Karen I don’t know how I missed your beautiful post last Wednesday. The guarantee of the afterlife is one thing we can take to the bank with confidence. I have a vision that our beloved can time travel and see into our futures. I believe they know we will join them hand in hand. They see our grief and mourning but it doesn’t matter because they know we are coming to join them in eternity. See how your post inspired me Karen? Gary

 

I sure don't look forward to driving to dialysis in snow! It has been too dry for too long I know. I knew this was coming. Still really sucks though!

 

I’ve seen you in action three month now George. I know you’re not a quitter. Stumble forward Bro. I love you.

 

Oh shit of course I will love ya back . Gotta be strong as F!

 

George we speak the same language. When any male would ask me how I was doing I’d say you don’t “explicative” want to know! We got 3” of heavy wet snow. I heard a lot of car accidents on the scanner and scrubbed the grief support meeting. I hope you are resting well Bro. I’ve been thinking about you and our older brother Lou. I’m Hoping Lou kicked his cold. Good to see Chad make several posts today along with Rick. I can feel the loneliness of the winter creeping in. I am going to start making hiking sticks and canes to fill my time. Chad I’m glad you have a supportive brother too. It’s good you’re exercising and getting a good diet. I’ve thought about what Cheryl would think if she saw me suffering over losing her. The grief support facilitator tells us we can not suppress our grief or it will effect our health or create unhealthy behaviors. Sometimes when I mourn I tell Cheryl I’m sorry honey I just have to get this pain out. Please give me some time and I will work through this. Also I tell Cheryl it was not your fault you had to die. It just had to be this way. We will be together again when my time is done. Gary

 

Gary, that was a very wise & moving
statement to your soulmate, Cheryl:
" It was not your fault you had to die. . " Thanks for your concern about my
health. When I had a fever and chills,
I did bedrest for 3 days, and didn't
panic. I was lucky bc I didn't have a
sore throat & runny nose, like I did, a few weeks ago. That's horrible about
the heavy snow, Gary. Be very careful
if you have to shovel. The best thing
of being a retiree, in my small apartment bldg., is that the management uses a snow plow, to clear the walkways
Lou