Does this get easier

Bernadine, woke up briefly , at 3:30am,
my time. I saw the joyous, psychedelic
Beatles' music video, Happy Birthday.
I had never seen it before. Ringo is my
favotite: 1st: he's the lone survivor, 2nd,
Nice guy, solid martiage, and 3rd, my
friend is the lead in drum room. Thank
Ago I, Bernadine! Lou

 

Thank you, not "Ago 1"---did you catch that
July 4th blooper, Karen ?

 

Lou, I just got on line at 8:30Am and saw your blooper. I thought about teasing you, but then again thought it may spoil your post birthday "glow".

 

Karen, you made my birthday complete.
The summer after Linda died, I told no
one about my birthday. Now,I tell
everyone.I was flattered yesterday,
when I ran into a woman, about 50, with
her college aged daughter. She was
astonished that I turned 73,& said I was
physically fit,& looked like I'm 60. I told
her that's how I feel. You may recall that
I was attracted to this woman ---- 'til I
found out she was married,when I met
her husband! Lou
,

 

You’re welcome Lou! I hope you spent some time with friends, enjoyed good food and had a good birthday. Robin

 

Thank you again, Robin, for your special
greeting!!I'm still walking on air, from
yesterday. At cafe, listening to older man
playing guitar and singing patriotic songs,
like I'm a Yankee Doodle Dandy. Very
appropriate for my birthday. I remember
Jimmy Cagney, who usually played
gangsters, singing & dancing in an Uncle
Sam outfit..... Lou

 

So great to hear Lou. It does my heart good to hear how you enjoyed your birthday. You’ve come a long way from not wanting to say it was your birthday and being alone. And the beautiful day you had this year.
Birthdays can be very hard. Looks like you were able to make it an enjoyable day.
I got to see fireworks twice over the weekend, we made a small bbq and were in my pool. We had patriotic music playing during dinner. Overall a nice day. Robin

 

Robin, your 4th sounds wonderful. I'm
proud of us. BOTH of us have come a long
way. Lou

 

Happy Belated birthday! Im glad to hear that you enjoyed it. Being that you love music that was a great way to spend your special day. I hope you got to see some fireworks and no they were a celebration of your day as well. Hope all is well. Take care!

 

Thank you, Nicole! I'm glad I decided to
announce my Fourth of July birthday
with my friends, both on & off GIC. I've never met anyone,personally, who has
this special birthday. Music & friends ,
as well as moving to this friendly small
town by the sea, has been my salvation.
Linda always liked this place, and I'm
grateful she got to see it with me in what
would turn out to be her last years. I opened up to people , about Linda, on the
Fourth. I told a spiritual friend, that Linda
always wanted a hot dog that day. So, I
bought & ate TWO, one for me and one for
Linda. Lou

 

My 4th was very nice. Just what I needed. Yes Lou, I’m proud of us too. My first 4th after Ron passed my brother invited me for a bbq and to go in his pool. I decided to go. Let’s put it this way, there were a lot of tears. It was a very difficult day. They invited me back for Labor Day and made it a birthday party for me. Walked out with a birthday cake singing happy birthday. I lost it. You see, Ron wanted to be the loudest singing to me and he was missing.
I love that you had a hotdog for Linda! Robin

 

Robin, you, Deb , and I are a lot alike.We can be a slobbering mess , at times.
Went to my town movie theater to see
Some Came Running (1958),with my
hero, Sinatra and Dean Martin. It was a
powerful film. I went alone, and cried at
the end, but I'm glad I went. When I was
a boy, I went to a theater like this one,
and found the movies to be magical. Lou

 

I remember the woman. Did she move away with her husband?

 

No, her name is Lorraine. Hadn't seen
them since last Oct, so I thought they
moved. They walk their Rottweiler (!)
early in the am, but don't like the crowd
of both tourists and locals, with their
dogs, some friendly, some not. It was
great to see her again. Lou

 

Pete,

I always HATE!!! having to say this because at times, words seem so shallow, but I hope you know how truly sorry I am to hear that your fiance, Stacey, passed away almost two years ago. It SUCKS!!! My husband, Bob, died on April 11, 2021 at 3:45 a.m. By the time he died, he had a specialist for just about every body part. Although he was sick for many years, he was still able to enjoy life (the side effects from his cancer drugs were manageable) through the end of 2017. Around the beginning of 2015, I began helping him with his ADL's, but it wasn't until the beginning of 2018, when we moved out of state, that I had to become his full time caregiver. It was the most difficult!!!, the very hardest job, I ever had, but, and this is one of those really BIG!!! BUTS!!!, I would do it all over again. Bob was, and always will be, the one true love of my life... I miss him more than I can ever express in words... It SUCKS!!! (I seem to be stuck on SUCKS!!!) I need a tissue...

The 15th month anniversary of Bob's death is on July 11th. After (almost) 15 months, things have gotten easier for me, but although I don't want to be the picture of doom and gloom, I think the roller coaster of emotions you're experiencing, is here to stay... "Normal," given our circumstances. Life will always be so very bittersweet, a mix of happy and sad, as Robin describes it. Up until recently, I thought fully grieving would allow us to continue healing right up until the time I am reunited with Bob, you are reunited with Stacey, all of TGW are reunited with the one true love of their lives. Now I'm not so sure. I'm beginning to think I'm just getting used to living alone, feeling lonely, even when I'm with friends or family. It SUCKS!!!

I want to leave you on a more positive note. I knew from the very first time that I was able to laugh again, not one of those forced, fake laughs, but a REAL!!! laugh, that I was going to be okay, never the same, but okay. I don't remember exactly when this happened (suffering from foggy widow brain big time today), but gradually, over time, I began feeling a little better. I'm finally at the point where I can go out and have fun with a friend, but, and this is another one of those really BIG BUTS!!!, I still cry daily. However, unlike it was for almost the entire first year, I'm able to win more battles than I lose with Mr. Grief, sometimes kicking the F*CK!!! out of him, knocking him unconscious for awhile, allowing me to enjoy at least part of the day. Although it SUCKS!!!, I'll take bittersweet over the alternative any day!!!, TUTTAM!!! (Total Understatement To The Absolute Max)

You've already met many of my friends, TGW, our GIC "family." They've said everything I can think of, and have given you lots to think about, so stopping here (for now.) I'm so sorry you had to find us, but so glad you did. I don't know how I would have made it this far if it wasn't for TGW... Our GIC "family" has given me the strength to continue fighting Mr. Grief, and some of us who were thrown into this "new" life, a life that not one of us would have chosen, prior to me, have helped me realize that the world can still be a good place, full of new adventures... For the first time since Bob's death, instead of dreading the future, I'm looking forward to it.

Getting way off track, so backing up just a bit, welcome to TGW, our GIC family. I hope you will stick around, give us the chance to get to know you, and you the chance to get to know us.

Sending you lots of hugs and love, wishing you peace, all of us peace. DEB

 

Pete,

The ocean was Bob's, my very favorite place in the entire world. Like you, I live close to the ocean, but can't go to the beach, the restaurants by the water, etc., etc., etc., the places that Bob and I enjoyed together. Way too many memories, once so happy, now so bittersweet... Also, like other GW have mentioned, I still can't listen to music. Living in a world without music SUCKS!!!

This is common for so many of us, but in time, like you, I hope I'll be able to enjoy these things again.

As always, sending you lots of hugs and love, wishing you peace, all of us peace. DEB

 

So glad the "Debster" , as my younger
brother, George, calls you, is back on
GIC, doing what you do best: welcoming
& comforting new members. GIC is
not the same without your famous,
heartfelt "books". Lou

 

Lou,

Thanks for the smiles... I love!!! your attitude!!!, TUTTAM!!!, SCFED!!! You have come such a long way since last July when we first "met." You made me realize that life, although forever changed, can still be good.

As always, sending you hugs, wishing you peace, all of us peace. DEB

 

George,

I'm finally out of MIA mode. It seems like ages since I've "talked" to you. Sending you the BIGGEST!!! virtual hug and lots of love... It SUCKS!!!

Super tired, took a long walk this morning. By the time I got home, the feels like temp was about 100 degrees. I lost my train of thought, so stopping here, but love that I can blame it on my foggy widow brain, lol...

I hope tomorrow is a better day... with at least one reason to LMSO.

Sending you lots more hugs and love, wishing you peace, all of us peace. DEB

 

A/K/A The Debster