Coping with the sudden loss of my mother

bmahone2, I am so sorry for your loss. In regards to your question, I suppose the first thing I would suggest is to reach out to others and try to connect with those who may understand~ which is exactly what you're doing. Four months is no time at all to know how to cope and move forward after the loss of someone as significant as a parent. This is a tragic and life altering loss at any age, but especially the fact that you're both so young makes it even more unexpected and challenging to cope with. A lot of people will say that keeping busy after loss helps, but I don't know if "drowning" in work necessarily counts. While it does provide some distraction (and as you said, you have no choice but to work) I wonder if you're also making time to sit with this loss and grieve in the way you need to. The thing I find about grief is that it is very patient. No matter how much we avoid it or try to distract ourselves from it, it will sit and it will wait until we're ready to full acknowledge and experience it. Why would we want to do that when it is so painful and when it hurts so much? Well, I suppose because it's the only way to truly move through it and not be damaged by it in the long term. More than anything, what I find helps so many people move forward especially after the loss of a parent is to try and think about what their loved one would want for them. Our parents want us to find a place in our life that is filled with love, happiness and peace. As far away as that may seem now, hear your mom's voice, think about what she would want for you, and allow that to be the beacon that shines brighter above everything else as you try to find your way forward. I'm glad you've found us here and I'm hoping you can find some comfort and support within this site. I wish you all the best~