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My dad was my Friend

Discussion in 'Loss of a Parent' started by Mahsa, Feb 24, 2018.

  1. Mahsa

    Mahsa New Member

    2 months ago I lost my Dad in a car crash,My mum was also in the car,She still can't walk and she needs to go through another surgery.I still can't accept the fact that my dad is gone,I keep repeating the last day he was alive,the last time I said goodbye in my mind.He was my role model,my friend,my teacher...and now...I just feel empty.
    I can't take my classes and I've lost my concentration.I keep smiling at my Mum,Making her laugh and telling her that i'm ok and we're gonna be fine...but honestly?I'm not ok...I'm not ok when my classmates start talking about their families,I'm not ok when I see his photoes.I get so sad sometimes that I actually feel the physical pain.I don't know how to handle this feeling.
    I'm an only child and my biggest fear is being alone...And now I'm just scared,alone...and feeling empty.
    My Dad was my best friend,We used to go for walks,talk for hours.he used to helped me during my exams and he encouraged me through every stage of my life.we had so many plans but now..they're just gone.I don't want people worrying about me,especially my mum.She's having a hard time as well and I don't want to be a burden...but sometimes...I just want to yell and scream that why did this happen..to me,to us,to him.
    I can't help but think what it would've been like if he was here.
    Sometimes...It's just too much to handle