I was awoken at 6 am. in his 'father's panic voice.' he said i needed to get dressed. momma has been sick most of her life, things outside of her control. i was thinking it was to the hospital again. sadly that was a normal thing. i go to help her pack a bag but dad stops me and tells me to up back upstairs. i do but i hear people and see the lights. my heart flutters wildly but i tell myself that dad jumped the gun again. it's too calm and voices are too low. i deny, deny, deny but people forget about my hearing. i heard the name of the place she was being taken to. it was not the hopstial. i don't remember much expect screaming to the top of the lungs over and over. to the point i am dry heaving. i know this seems a bit early it just happened. yet, she was my friend, i was her caretaker and consist companion. we were going to get blueberries today and make fruit desserts. she was okay (for her) yesterday. i know it's not a dream i will never see her is this house again. everything as made me cry that she brought, touched, i got for her. i snapped at the mail carrier when she called me Mrs. Campbell. i'm sorry i know it takes time and it's okay to cry but it hurts. i just want someone to talk to.